🛑 Get Off the Couch: Why Today's Men Need to Stop Waiting and Start Doing

The Problem: Soft Guys, Soft Beliefs

We’re raising a whole generation of guys who are stuck. They’re like grown-up kids who won’t leave home.

They have soft hands because they do soft work, and they hear soft messages from the church. Preachers aren’t telling men to be strong anymore; they’re just making everyone feel good.

They tell guys to “wait on God” while their best years, their 30s just slip away.

These men can argue about the Bible online all day, but they can’t handle real life:

• They can’t look a good woman’s father in the eye.

• They can’t hold a screaming baby at 2 a.m.

• They always “feel led” to switch churches but never “feel led” to buy a ring.

We’ve traded hard work for watching videos. We’ve traded real promises for “taking things one season at a time.”

The churches helped by becoming cruise directors instead of demanding leaders. Nobody says, “Dude, you’re wasting your life.” They say, “Take it easy. God’s timing. Just do you.”

This makes a 33-year-old boy with a study Bible and a secret problem feel totally normal.

The Cost: Everyone Loses

The women are waiting for men to step up, but they keep finding these nice, smart guys who won’t commit. They want a man who is strong and ready, but they call him “too much” when he shows up. So they end up with a rotation of guys who can talk well but can’t commit. Lost years, lost chances.

This lazy living is dangerous:

If the dad never grows up, the government will step in to parent. The schools will teach your kids what a man is. The phone will show your son what a man is.

A boy who never becomes a man is easy to control. He will give up everything important for comfort, Wi-Fi, and a gaming setup.

The Fix: Responsibility is the Way Out

The only way out of being stuck is to take on real responsibility.

This is why marriage and fatherhood matter. They don’t look good on Instagram; they force you to grow up.

You don’t “feel ready” to be a husband. You become one by saying “I do” and putting her first, every day.

You don’t “feel ready” to be a father. You become one the second you hold that baby and realize you have a job you can’t quit.

If you’re a guy in your 30s and all you’ve made is some angry tweets, a computer setup, and a bookshelf, you’re not cursed. You’re just stuck.

You won’t get unstuck by reading more books. You get unstuck by making vows and getting callouses.

The Simple Plan:

1. Ask the girl out.

2. Ask her dad for coffee.

3. Get a job that’s hard.

4. Give money to your church even when it hurts.

5. Serve when no one is watching.

It won’t feel fun or romantic. It will feel like dying to yourself. That’s good. You can’t be resurrected if you never die.

Get a job. Marry the girl. Raise the kids. Read the Book.

Grow up before your best years are gone.

h/t to @Biblicalman for the encouragement and message that inspired this today.